小学四年级英语手抄报

　　幽默笑话 　　Marriage Proposal to Bernard Shaw 　　Once a beautiful and dissolute British actress wrote to propose marriage to Bernard Shaw. She said she did not mindBernard Shaw's old age and ugliness because he was a genius. And if they could combine the beauty of the woman with the talents of the great man，that would be greatly harmonious. “With your wisdom and my appearance，our children must be perfect.” 　　Bernard Shaw answered，in a letter，that her imagination wassplendid，“But，what if the children take my appearance and yourwisdom?” 　　向肖伯纳求婚 　　英国有位美貌风流的女演员，曾写信向肖伯纳求婚。她说，因为他是个天才，她不嫌肖伯纳年迈丑陋。假如能使女郎的美貌和超人的天才结合，那该是多么协调啊。“咱们的后代有你的智慧和我的美貌，那一定是十全十美了。” 　　肖伯纳给她回了一封信说，她的想象很是美妙，“可是，假如生下的孩子外貌象我，而智慧又象你，那又该怎么办呢?” 　　He Won 　　Tommy: How is your little brother, Johnny? Johnny: He is ill in bed. He hurt himself. 　　Tommy: That's too bad. How did that happen? 　　Johnny: We played who could lean furthest out of the window, and he won. 　　他赢了 　　汤姆：约翰尼，你小弟弟好吗? 　　约翰尼：他害病卧床了。他受了伤。 　　汤姆：真糟糕，怎么回事儿? 　　约翰尼：我们做游戏，看谁能把身子探出窗外最远，他赢了。 　　I Have His Ear in My Pocket 　　Ivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked, "What happened?" 　　"A kid bit me," replied Ivan. 　　"Would you recognize him if you saw him again?" asked his mother. 　　"I'd know him any where," said Ivan. "I have his ear in my pocket." 　　他的耳朵在我衣兜里 　　伊凡鼻子流着血回到家里。他妈妈问，“发生了什么事?” 　　“一个男孩咬了我一口，”伊凡说。 　　“再见到他你能认出来吗?”妈妈问。 　　“他走到哪里我都能认出他，”伊凡说。“他的耳朵还在我衣兜里呢。” 　　A Good Boy 　　Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?" 　　"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered. 　　"You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?" 　　"She is the one who sells the candy." 　　好孩子 　　小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。 　　“昨天给你的钱干什么了?” 　　“我给了一个可怜的老太婆，”他回答说。 “你真是个好孩子，”妈妈骄傲地说。“再给你两分钱。可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢?” 　　“她是个卖糖果的。” 　　Drunk 　　One day, a father and his little son were going home. At this age, the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. Now, he asked, "What's the meaning of the word 'Drunk', dad?" "Well, my son," his father replied, "look, there are standing two policemen. If I regard the two policemen as four then I am drunk." 　　"But, dad," the boy said, " there's only ONE policeman!" 　　醉酒 　　一天，父亲与小儿子一道回家。这个孩子正处于那种对什么事都很感兴趣的年龄，老是有提不完的问题。他向父亲发问道：“爸爸，‘醉’字是什么意思?” “唔，孩子，”父亲回答说，“你瞧那儿站着两个警察。如果我把他们看成了四个，那么我就算醉了。” “可是，爸爸， ”孩子说，“那儿只有一个警察呀!” 　　Hospitality 　　The hostess apologized to her unexpected guest for serving an apple-pie without any cheese. The little boy of the family left the room quietly for a moment and returned with a piece of cheese which he laid on the guest's plate. The visitor smiled, put the cheese into his mouth and then said: "You must have better eyes than your mother, sonny. Where did you find the cheese?" "In the rat-trap, sir," replied the boy. 　　好客 　　由于客人在吃苹果馅饼时，家里没有奶酪了，于是女主人向大家表示歉意。这家的小男孩悄悄地离开了屋子。过了一会儿，他拿着一片奶酪回到房间，把奶酪放在客人的盘子里。 客人微笑着把奶酪放进嘴里说：“孩子，你的眼睛就是比你妈妈的好。你在哪里找到的奶酪?” “在捕鼠夹上，先生。”那小男孩说。 　　英语小笑话 　　上个星期五我穿了一件 Adidas 的衣服去打球, 一个老美看到就笑我说, "Do you 　　know what does it mean? It means All Day I Dream About Sex.我整天都在想著 　　性, 缩写正好是 Adidas) " 我正惊讶他怎么反应这么快, 联想力这么丰富时,旁边的 　　一个老美帮我解围, 他说, 有一个很著名的合唱团 Korn, 他们的招牌歌之一就是 　　A.D.I.D.A.S, (All day I dream about sex)所以呢,这个典故可是很多老美都耳熟 　　能详的喔! 下次就换你去取笑老美了. 　　A man goes to church and starts talking to God. He says: "God, what is a million dollars to you?" and God says: "A penny", then the man says: "God, what is a million years to you?" and God says: "a second", then the man says: "God, can I have a penny?" and God says "In a second" 　　一男子进入教堂和上帝对话.他问:"主啊, 一百万美元对你意味着多少?"上帝回答:"一便士."男子又问:"且话偻蚰昴?"上帝说:"一秒钟."最后男子请求道:"上帝,我能得到一便士吗?"上帝回答:"过一秒钟."